My favourite bus experience

I was chatting to some friends the other day about bus experiences. If you've ever travelled long distance on a bus I'm sure you can imagine how the conversation went: fried chicken, dubious men, ablution horrors and so on.

My slightly shameful confession is that in spite of it all (and there is a lot to be in spite of!), I actually quite like traveling on the bus. Its the unsanitised version of life, you know? Where you are forced to interact with people you would never have interacted with otherwise, deal with situations you would never have had to deal with other wise.

So with that in mind, let me share with you my favorite bus story of all time. Remarkably, I have had a few really great bus experiences. But this was the best:

In East London you can board the bus in two places that I know of: The Windmill and the Station. Now let me just not beat about the bush so I can paint the picture for you: white people do not board the bus at the Station. White people board the bus at The Windmill. The station is in the middle of town, noisy bustlely, street vendors and so forth.

Ok. So keep that picture in your mind. Now if I remember correctly, the bus picks people up at The Windmill first, then at the station. So if you board at The Windmill, which white people do, you then bus to the Station where you wait about another hundred years for people to board at the Station before you finally leave town to go where you are going.

So after many bus trips I decided I was over the hundred hour wait at the Station. So I booked a ticket from the Station. All fine and dandy till I realise this means my mom and gran will have to drop me off at the Station. Oh well, its all fine, I get dropped off at the Station. Things are going fine except for me somehow being bustled to the end of the queue a few times and my mom exhorting me to push otherwise I'll never get on the bus.

There is one other scruffy looking white man waiting to board the bus. While my mom is waiting for me to elbow my way through the luggage queue (I hate elbowing, but I was getting further and further *away* from the bus as the throngs of people elbowed in front of me), this man sidles up to my mom and says,
"Don't worry about your daughter 'mam. I have a gun."

!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So as soon as I manage to extracate myself from the luggage throng to join the getting onto the bus throng, my mother pulls me aside and whispers "Don't sit anywhere near that man!"

Like I was going to!

Hehe.

Anyway, that was my all time favourite bus experience.